It was suggested to me by a friend that I should write more. This is funny, as I
can’t write a thank you letter without hundreds of mistakes in it. Although I am very creative, I express my words through the marks I make on the canvas. The canvas is my blank empty page. Ready to tell an untold story – not sure what’s the beginning or how it’s going to end. I can’t really communicate with strangers. As I have a speech difficulty, my paintings are my words, my voice.
I’m waiting to receive a text. The fact I can’t pick up the phone to call someone for the reply to my simple question is frustrating me. The phone beeps. I stumble around the Nokia brick with my shaky hands trying to unlock the phone, got to have quick reactions to unlock this phone.
‘1 received message’.
After a couple of minutes, I manage to unlock it. I open the message, and it’s not from the person whom I am waiting to hear from. I quickly text a reply back and go to the laptop.
Finding the website Facebook is like finding my proper voice. A voice that everyone can understand. I can pretend I am able-bodied on it. Nobody asks you to tick a box saying ‘Are you disabled?’ I love it, I can talk to people who I wouldn’t never dream of phoning.I’m in town and I need to know how to get somewhere. I start asking a stranger the question and as I start to speak and I notice the person’s scared look in their eyes, their blank expression on their faces. I wait a moment in silence and suddenly they nod and agree with me. I wait a bit longer, for an answer, which never seems to come. After a moment I realise I will never get my answer to my question. Should I repeat myself? I catch their eye again and with a deep breath I slowly repeat my question. I will stand here all day and repeat myself over and over again if I have to, if that what it takes for them to understand me. Then the statue like figure in front of me finally loosen up and I hold my breath for an answer…Back in my studio I reflected on what has just happened. I splash some paint on the canvas and I realised I’m back. I’m back in my world again.
About Me
- Studio1
- I can escape through painting, exploring and pushing the boundaries between a disabled world and an able-bodied world. I have recently graduated from the Slade School of Fine Art, London with a Masters of Fine Art (MFA) in painting. Previously I did my BA at Falmouth College of Art, Cornwall Having studied at Art College for six years, it has given me the experience and the self- confidence to paint freely. I use humour as my inspiration to produce large-scale, brightly coloured figurative paintings. My current work is to do with people treating me differently because of my disability. I have a physical disability – Cerebral Palsy. This affects my speech and hand co-ordination. My awkward hand movements work to my advantage when I paint. This helps me to express all my frustration and it brings spontaneity to the paintings. Without being able to verbally communicate with strangers easily at first, my work acts like a visual voice. I want to break down barriers between disabled and able-bodied people. For me, I don’t want any barriers in my way. I am an expressive artist at you can see some of my work at: www.lucyapple.com
1 comment:
hello lovely lucy,
good to see you in the blogging world.
And don't worry, you write beautifully and honestly. It's a great insight both into your creative life and your life as a disabled woman.
love youxxx
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